the shatter of earth's collapse
☂
Not that anyone will actually see this, but you might or might not have gotten the reference above...anyway. Please do note that this online journal has been fighting the battle of neglect and time, often on the losing end, and really does feel like some sort of blue elephant that one's got to keep somewhat alive. For the sake of tradition, I suppose.
(K) Yuan here.
linkage
blue birds flap fandoms + happiness + the lot where the ego centersit's all quite narcissistic, really.
Date: <$BlogDateHeaderDate$>
Time: 6:06 PM
Author:(potassium)
Permalink: isolation →
note to a character, long past.
it is understandable if you get angry, or frustrated, or sad, or generally moody.
it is understandable if these *moods* affect your work.
it is not, however, an excuse.
however much you're paid and however high you rank you are still doing a service and that service is through a platform that is school and we, students, come to school to learn, and you, a teacher, to teach. to impart knowledge, to facillitate experiences, to interact. and service doesn't (or rather, shouldn't) stop just because you're SAD or DEPRESSED or *divorced* or something or other, and no bullying your students when you don't feel like being a teacher is not going to solve your bloody problems
none of which are, frankly, any of our business unless you make it so.
granted, you can be nice and friendly to us but dammit woman when you are even just slightly pissed it's like PAP's mother's going to strike us with volcanoes and lightnings and no one understands why
and it's so bloody unreasonable that it borders on tyrannical
your behaviour is *guided by the winds and the clouds of your life* and you, as an i/c of -discipline- take the whole student population (along with some of your collegues) into your storm. and then, hey, storm = effective results okay just keep yelling them into place and *proper behaviour*
i'm saying this now and not two years ago for obvious reasons. i'd made stupid decisions and saw the eye of your hurricane - that was my bad judgement. (though it was kinda serving a sledgehammer to a stapler bullet) but when the same/worse treatment is given to others (a friend, no less) for reasons far less severe and hell lot more petty --
this is my grudge against you. specifically, your infantile behaviour.
and for the love of all things you don't even recognise the simplest principle of feedback and its immense value -- not that the system allows much for that, but you. you take it to a whole new level; it's blasphemous to do so. a student tries to provide a comment that would help with your methods (in a subtle manner): an errant, rebellious insult to your face your character you as a superior STORM THEM BACK INTO PLACE
and you're supposed to be a 'role model'.
it's alright to have favourites, most people do. it's fine to show them, it's understandable. but when it clearly disadvantages everyone else and affects your work and their learning is when i want to serve a sledgehammer to your senses.
like a child and his/her playthings; when they don't go as you want, scream and throw a tantrum. and oh look, we can move too! no need for mummy or daddy to move them for you.
i don't mind you seeing this. in fact, i hope that somehow, you would come across this. i think it's bloody obvious without having to mention your name. you're not there anymore and neither am i, hence i write this without censorship. go on, murder me. or if you've unclouded your head a bit, answer me this: why the childish behaviour? It's very easily disguised as discipline, and bullying is terribly hard to define. Your methods may have been acceptable or even praised a century ago, but it's not how archaic they are that is infuriating, it's what drives them: you. you and your very own self.
you repel me.
Labels: pissy rants, pissy woman
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